Category: 2024 Story

Riley Buckneberg

Posted on October 30, 2024 by - 2024 Story

What is the story related to resilience that you’d like to share?

At the beginning of the 2023 fall semester, I had hit my lowest point in my mental health journey. I felt like I had no purpose in life. I had just spent my 20th birthday in the middle of a first-trimester miscarriage. My GPA started slipping, and the mess in my apartment piled up by the day. Life didn’t stop; I couldn’t give up because I still had responsibilities, so I ignored it. I thought at some point I would just push through it. I treated my mental health issues like an annoying younger sibling and planned to ignore them until they went away.

After of couple months of thinking I would just snap out of it, I realized that much like a little sibling, it doesn’t just go away. I decided to reach out to my campus counseling office to talk through the thoughts trapped in my head. That 30-minute meeting was the first step in my journey. At my first visit, it was concluded that I needed to find purpose outside of my classes and home. In the hours following my session with the counselor, I had reached out to the Lost&Found program to become a mentor and help anyone struggling like me. Once I became a mentor, I was more satisfied with life. I finally saw my GPA get back into good standing, and I had the motivation to even get a job. I thought I had finally figured it out.

After about 2 months of mentoring, I realized I wasn’t doing as good as I thought. I felt successful and satisfied, but those feelings were draining. I was finally back to being the student I prided myself on being, I loved my job, I had my zest for life back but only when I was in public. How could I be so selfish to reach out for help? I knew how much help was available to me. I knew that if I could just pick up the phone or send an email, I would have someone there to support me. But I couldn’t do it. My grades were fine, I was able to keep a job, I saw friends and family regularly. On paper, I felt like I didn’t deserve support, that I for some reason, I didn’t qualify. I meant I was fine, I just felt a little sad sometimes. One day I reached out to the Lost&Found program to see if I could get a mentor, and I was paired up with someone within the week. In the following weeks, I learned that reaching out for support didn’t make me less than, in fact it gave me the support I needed to be the best mentor I could be. I still meet with both my mentor and my mentee and I truly don’t know where I would be without either of them.

It is easy to say “I don’t need it that much, I will be just fine,” but everyone deserves and needs proper support. Behind every smile, every pair of eye bags, every pimple and dimple, everybody is just trying to get through the day. Everybody has something and no experience is more deserving of support than another.

 

What strengths can you identify within yourself that helped you navigate the situation? 

In navigating this experience, I relied heavily on self-understanding and humbleness.

 

Did you have a person or persons to look to for support during this time? If so, what was it about that person/those people that was helpful or not helpful? If not, what did you do instead?

I did have people supporting me during these times. They all supported me in their own ways. Some would be a listening ear, some would give me words of encouragement, and others would just have to validate my experience. They all helped and were important in these times.

 

What resources did you use during that time? Are there any barriers or limitations regarding access to these resources? What resources do you think still need to be developed for others?

At this time, the only resource I could consistently use was Peer2Peer. There were no barriers or limitations with access.

 

What is one thing related to your experience that you wish everyone could understand? What advice might you share with someone who is experiencing something similar?

I wish people knew that they don’t have to “qualify” for support. The people who are here to support you through your struggles know that sometimes you may struggle with depression and others you may just need someone to hear about how traffic was horrendous on your drive to work that day. There are people able and willing to listen to your story. You aren’t less for struggling, you aren’t less for being afraid, and you aren’t less for wanting help even if you “don’t deserve it.” My advice would be to remind yourself that these moments are temporary. They are a storm to weather and when you rejoice on the other side, it will truly feel amazing.

 

 

Jacson Welte

Posted on September 30, 2024 by - 2024 Story

What is the story related to resilience that you’d like to share?

Entering 2023, I was in what I thought was a healthy relationship with my then-girlfriend. She had become distant, and communication was lacking. I was scared I had done something wrong to deserve this treatment. The lack of communication then became a version of blaming me for everything wrong in her life. She eventually ended the relationship. After experiencing this situation, naturally I questioned who I was and the type of person I am. It truly was the dark times. I was desperate for any escape from the gut-wrenching feeling every waking second.

I decided it would be best if I let go of my ego, pushed myself to try something new, and redefined myself. So I went to work at a summer camp in Minnesota on a lake. I was scared at first, and progress felt impossible. But week by week, I started meeting the new me that was developing before my eyes by being thrust into leadership positions. Aha, I have found myself and my calling once again. The pain and desperation I had felt seemingly melted away from my heart and soul. I had survived my darkest days experienced thus far in my life.

 

What strengths can you identify within yourself that helped you navigate the situation? 

I recognized my willingness to learn and to be a leader. I also recognized my ability to kill my ego in order to find inner peace. It is a difficult and humbling process but extremely worth it. I also kept my trust in the world and in myself.

 

Did you have a person or persons to look to for support during this time? If so, what was it about that person/those people that was helpful or not helpful? If not, what did you do instead?

I had a few friends and my therapist as my biggest support system. They offered different perspectives on the situations, and they acted as my north stars. I fell from my path quite often, but they were all patient enough to help me through it.

 

What resources did you use during that time? Are there any barriers or limitations regarding access to these resources? What resources do you think still need to be developed for others?

I utilized therapy at this time. There were no barriers with the interaction except the process of actually getting into therapy on campus being difficult and unpredictable. I think what could have aided me even more so would have been someone dedicated to relationship advice and mitigation.

 

What is one thing related to your experience that you wish everyone could understand? What advice might you share with someone who is experiencing something similar?

One thing I want people to understand is that no matter what, you must live with yourself at the end of the day. The hurt your loved ones can inflict upon you can feel endless, but the hurt you perpetrate upon yourself by not letting go is even worse. Take your time to feel your feelings. It isn’t supposed to feel good or safe, but when you survive the feeling, you can recognize you can do anything and that eventually, this too shall pass.

 

Katie Milbrandt - Stories of Resilience. College-age woman stands in a white shorts jumper.

Katie Milbrandt

Posted on September 12, 2024 by - 2024 Story

What is the story related to resilience that you’d like to share?

My mental health journey started when I was very young. I was exposed to the not-so-good side of mental illness before I was even in middle school. My older sister is my best friend and biggest inspiration, but sadly I had to learn what mental illness was from her struggles and experiences.

In high school, I was bullied a lot, which greatly impacted my mental health. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety, but nothing seemed to be helping. I decided to transfer schools and have a “fresh start.” I felt like I had more of a purpose and was so much happier after finally deciding to help myself.

During my freshman year of college on a random weekend in April, I woke up to a call from my mom in the early morning hours. That morning, I found out that my cousin died by suicide, ultimately losing her battle with mental illness.

Fast forward to February 14, 2022—the day I tried to end my life. I was at the lowest point possible, depressed, unmotivated, and surrounded by people who were only tearing me down. I was willing to give up on 17+ years of education, end the friendships I created, and leave my job and the family who raised me. I was ready to throw in the towel and give up for good. Thankfully, I got help before it was too late.

Looking back, each encounter I have had with mental health and mental illness has helped me find my purpose in life. I have always been an empathetic person, and I feel emotions very strongly, which is why I never want anyone to feel the way I have. After losing loved ones, and almost losing my own life, I have made it my mission to have a voice for those who no longer do and share my story—how I turned struggle into strength. It has been a long and tough journey to get to where I am today, but I am so grateful to be an advocate for mental health and be the person to prove that things do get better. Ever since I started advocating for mental health, I’ve been asked questions like, “Why should I care about mental health?” “Is mental illness even real?” “Why can’t people just be happy?” My response is simple: everyone has mental health, just like we have physical health, and people who are affected by a mental illness have a much harder time controlling, regulating, and improving their mental health. Mental illness is a silent killer, taking more lives than breast cancer. When shown the reality of the matter, people tend to understand the severity and prevalence of mental health/mental illness, which is exactly what I aim to do with my platform through my involvement with the Miss America/Miss South Dakota organizations.

 

What strengths can you identify within yourself that helped you navigate the situation?

Besides resilience, I’d have to say courage—to keep moving forward even when I felt like giving up, determination—to not let my story end even when I wanted it to, and faith—that there was hope for a better future even when I didn’t think there was.

 

Did you have a person or persons to look to for support during this time? If so, what was it about that person/those people that was helpful or not helpful? If not, what did you do instead?

I saw a therapist and also talked to my mom, even though she lives 4 hours away since I moved from Wisconsin to South Dakota to go to college. They both helped me in their own ways, but the most helpful thing was to have someone who could be a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, and a voice of reason.

 

What resources did you use during that time? Are there any barriers or limitations regarding access to these resources? What resources do you think still need to be developed for others?

Thankfully, South Dakota State University provides free counseling services to all students, and I was able to meet one-on-one with a counselor as much as I needed. I think that more preventative resources need to be readily available, so that students can get the help they need before they find themselves in a time of crisis. I knew of the counseling center and at the time, thought it was my only option. I didn’t know how to make an appointment and didn’t want to be seen in the building out of fear of shame and embarrassment.

 

What is one thing related to your experience that you wish everyone could understand? What advice might you share with someone who is experiencing something similar?

Asking for help is a sign of strength. I have always been very independent, especially when I came to college. I always felt that needing help on an assignment or asking a friend to help me with something made me seem weak. I didn’t realize it at the time, but having that mentality was pushing people away, causing me to feel alone. I now know that asking for help is not a weakness, and that strength comes in numbers. Leaning on those around you will only help you, not hurt you.