What is the story related to resilience that you’d like to share?
At the beginning of the 2023 fall semester, I had hit my lowest point in my mental health journey. I felt like I had no purpose in life. I had just spent my 20th birthday in the middle of a first-trimester miscarriage. My GPA started slipping, and the mess in my apartment piled up by the day. Life didn’t stop; I couldn’t give up because I still had responsibilities, so I ignored it. I thought at some point I would just push through it. I treated my mental health issues like an annoying younger sibling and planned to ignore them until they went away.
After of couple months of thinking I would just snap out of it, I realized that much like a little sibling, it doesn’t just go away. I decided to reach out to my campus counseling office to talk through the thoughts trapped in my head. That 30-minute meeting was the first step in my journey. At my first visit, it was concluded that I needed to find purpose outside of my classes and home. In the hours following my session with the counselor, I had reached out to the Lost&Found program to become a mentor and help anyone struggling like me. Once I became a mentor, I was more satisfied with life. I finally saw my GPA get back into good standing, and I had the motivation to even get a job. I thought I had finally figured it out.
After about 2 months of mentoring, I realized I wasn’t doing as good as I thought. I felt successful and satisfied, but those feelings were draining. I was finally back to being the student I prided myself on being, I loved my job, I had my zest for life back but only when I was in public. How could I be so selfish to reach out for help? I knew how much help was available to me. I knew that if I could just pick up the phone or send an email, I would have someone there to support me. But I couldn’t do it. My grades were fine, I was able to keep a job, I saw friends and family regularly. On paper, I felt like I didn’t deserve support, that I for some reason, I didn’t qualify. I meant I was fine, I just felt a little sad sometimes. One day I reached out to the Lost&Found program to see if I could get a mentor, and I was paired up with someone within the week. In the following weeks, I learned that reaching out for support didn’t make me less than, in fact it gave me the support I needed to be the best mentor I could be. I still meet with both my mentor and my mentee and I truly don’t know where I would be without either of them.
It is easy to say “I don’t need it that much, I will be just fine,” but everyone deserves and needs proper support. Behind every smile, every pair of eye bags, every pimple and dimple, everybody is just trying to get through the day. Everybody has something and no experience is more deserving of support than another.
What strengths can you identify within yourself that helped you navigate the situation?
In navigating this experience, I relied heavily on self-understanding and humbleness.
Did you have a person or persons to look to for support during this time? If so, what was it about that person/those people that was helpful or not helpful? If not, what did you do instead?
I did have people supporting me during these times. They all supported me in their own ways. Some would be a listening ear, some would give me words of encouragement, and others would just have to validate my experience. They all helped and were important in these times.
What resources did you use during that time? Are there any barriers or limitations regarding access to these resources? What resources do you think still need to be developed for others?
At this time, the only resource I could consistently use was Peer2Peer. There were no barriers or limitations with access.
What is one thing related to your experience that you wish everyone could understand? What advice might you share with someone who is experiencing something similar?
I wish people knew that they don’t have to “qualify” for support. The people who are here to support you through your struggles know that sometimes you may struggle with depression and others you may just need someone to hear about how traffic was horrendous on your drive to work that day. There are people able and willing to listen to your story. You aren’t less for struggling, you aren’t less for being afraid, and you aren’t less for wanting help even if you “don’t deserve it.” My advice would be to remind yourself that these moments are temporary. They are a storm to weather and when you rejoice on the other side, it will truly feel amazing.
